


Widow's Legacy

by Karly_Quinn, Lady_Lala



Series: Ultimate Universe: DC Section 3000 [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: After Endgame AU, First in eventual crossover series, Gen, Grief/Mourning, No Slash, Origins, Religion, Teen to be safe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:40:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 11,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23875597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Karly_Quinn/pseuds/Karly_Quinn, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Lala/pseuds/Lady_Lala
Summary: Returning the Infinity Stones had been annoyingly hard, but I managed. Returning to 2023 would be even harder, so I didn’t. I ran away to 1945 and lived like I was in a dream, with the girl of my dreams… for a whole 12 hours. Peggy wouldn’t let me stay much longer. Captain America was needed elsewhere in time, but Steve Rogers needed time. Time to think, time to heal, time to learn. Luckily, another amazing woman in my life provided the perfect solution. A way I could have time to help myself while still helping others, and even learn of a greater cause. Black Widow's cause.-Steve Rogers
Series: Ultimate Universe: DC Section 3000 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1720687
Comments: 4
Kudos: 4





	1. Back to the Future

Returning the Infinity Stones had been annoyingly hard. Banner was a genius, but sometimes he could get to caught up in his own plans to notice the obvious flaws. Such as, if Steve was to return all the Infinity Stones without anyone noticing they had ever been missing, he would need the original packaging.

  
It had been Sam who had pointed out the flaw and it had taken a couple days for Bruce to come up with a replacement Tesseract Cube and so on. Those couple of days waiting had been enough time for a plan to form in Steve’s head.

  
Sam had gone to grab some snacks while Bucky and Cap watched the Hulk work on building replacement packages for the Stones.  
“Hey,” Bucky asked, “when you go back in time, could you do something for me?”

  
“Sure, what?”

  
Bucky pulled out an envelope stuffed near to bursting. “I want you to give this to our sarge. It’s the list of guys who didn’t survive…what happened to me. Their families deserve to know they aren’t coming home instead of always wondering.”  
“You think I can deliver this?”

  
“Yeah, I mean, he shouldn’t be too hard to find. Just pick a time after I ‘died’ when not much was going on.”

  
Steve nodded thoughtfully. A time when not much was going on…when the world was at peace. And if the letter from the future could stay in the past, couldn’t he? After all, the world was at peace again, wasn’t it?

  
So, Steve Rogers was back in 1945.

  
He had quickly realized he had no idea where Peggy lived.

  
He’d delivered the letter to S.H.I.E.L.D, using all the stealth skills he’d learned from Romanoff, and left a twenty-dollar bill to pay for the normal 1945 clothes he’d filched from the base. He couldn’t bring himself to dispose of the time travel suit, even as he reminded himself, he no longer had a need for it. So, he bought a briefcase and stuck it inside.

  
He missed the Internet and really wished he could just look up her address.

  
He tried to think of where she might be and came to realize he didn’t know much about Peggy outside a professional setting. He had no idea what she did in her free time.

  
He was feeling a little discouraged after wandering around Brooklyn for a couple hours, disturbed by how the once familiar sights and sounds had become foreign to him. He felt as out of place as when he had first woken up in the 21st century.

  
He wandered without purpose, but his feet had a mind of their own. He soon found himself outside the gates of the cemetery. He stepped inside and traveled the long familiar path to the grave with an angel standing over it.

  
Steve had been seventeen and dirt poor when his mother died. Sarah Rogers had contracted tuberculous as a nurse treating the afflicted and as the disease progressed Steve had taken on much of her care. His father had died before he was born in a mustard gas attack in World War I.

  
Steve worked hard, but his meager earnings were not enough to cover doctor visits and medicine. Bucky’s family was well off but believed in hard work and good character. Difference in economic class had never bothered Bucky or his parents; they saw Steve as a better man than most and welcomed him into their home as an equal.

  
It had taken a month of pestering for Bucky to convince Steve to let him hang out at his place. It had been a bit of a culture shock; Bucky knew not everyone had it as good as him, he’d seen how disheveled Steve’s clothes were, but he didn’t think things were this hard for him.

  
Steve had led him to a back room. The room was a bit drafty, but otherwise cozy. In the center was a bed stacked high with blankets. Steve gestured for Bucky to wait and moved to kneel by the side of the bed.

  
“Hey, Mom, you have a visitor. I brought Bucky with me.”

  
Bucky was startled by the frail hand that reached out to him, the pale face that turned to smile in his direction. Steve talked about his mother all the time; some kids worshiped sports stars; Steve gushed about how amazing his mother was. Bucky knew more about the woman than he did about his own mother. But never once had Steve mentioned she was ill.

  
Bucky knelt beside the frail woman, taking her hand in his. He could tell she had once been a great beauty, but the disease had ravaged her. “Hello, Miss Rogers. Steve’s told me a lot about you, and I got to say, I’m jealous.”

  
Sarah laughed weakly. “Don’t be. I’ve heard plenty about you too.” They chatted for a few minutes before it became clear Sarah was tired, and the two boys quietly excused themselves so she could rest.  
“Why didn’t you tell me she was sick?” Bucky hissed as soon as they were out of earshot. “Were you ashamed or somethin’? I didn’t think you were that shallow…”

  
“No! I just didn’t want you to think any less of her…”

  
“Cos you’re dirt poor?”

  
“No, I know you aren’t like that Bucky. Sure, you’re a bit sheltered” Bucky scoffed “but I wasn’t worried about that. It’s…she isn’t exactly pretty anymore. I just… well, if you came over, I knew I’d have to introduce you two. I wouldn’t lie to her; I don’t want her thinking I’m ashamed of her.”

  
“And you think she didn’t think that when you never had me come over?”

  
Steve hadn’t thought of that.

  
After that Steve had found himself being hired for odd jobs by the Barnes family quite frequently. Afterwards, he always walked away with the money for medicine and doctors, plus a little to spare. And when Sarah had passed away, it had been Mr. Barnes who handled the details and paid for the funeral.

  
It had been he who had commissioned the angel that looked like Sarah in her prime.

  
That angel was growing closer now. Steve used to visit his mother often, talking to her grave as if she could still hear him, letting her know everything that was on his mind. He often found the answers to his problems during those talks. He missed doing that. Back home, no in the future Steve corrected himself, the graveyard no longer existed and the angel was no more.

  
He stopped at the sight of a familiar brunette standing before the grave.

  
“I miss him” Peggy Carter was saying “knowing him, he’s probably regretting ‘standing me up’ and missing our dance right now. I know he’s probably dead, but I can’t bring myself to believe it. It’s been months, and at some point, I’ll have to move on. I think I could if I just knew what happened; I think we all could.

  
“You know, Sarah, he talked about you all the time. Even more than he talked about Bucky, rest their souls. He said he always felt better after visiting you, so I thought I’d try it out. Besides, he missed Mother’s Day. Consider it from him.”

  
Peggy bent down and placed a bouquet of roses by the tombstone. She turned on her heel and came face to face with Steve Rogers.

  
He was smiling gently at her. “You didn’t have to do that.” Peggy just stood there, frozen. “I missed you, Peg. Want to go for a dance?”

  
He took her hand in his and began a simple waltz. Peggy stumbled along, aghast.

  
“We’re in the middle of a graveyard! You’re practically dancing on your mother’s grave. This is hardly an appropriate place…”

  
“Any place with you is a place to dance.”

  
The next twelve hours were like a dream. They did all the things Steve had imagined them doing for years. Peggy was too overjoyed to ask questions, struggling to believe she wasn’t dreaming.  
They were sitting on the dock of Coney Island eating cotton candy as the stars twinkled above them when Peggy finally broached the topic.

  
“Where have you been, Steve Rogers?” she said as she boxed his ear. “You have no idea the hell you’ve put us all through these last few months!”

  
He looked at her sadly. “I do, believe me I do.”

  
“That does not answer my question, soldier.”

  
Steve hesitated. He wouldn’t lie to her, that was obvious. But he could withhold information. How much should he tell her? He didn’t like the idea of keeping secrets from the girl he wanted to make his wife. Why was he so hesitant to tell her the truth, to tell her about everything he had lived through without her? Why was he suddenly afraid?

  
The words of his dear sweet mother came to mind. “If you’re ever afraid to tell the woman in your life something, it’s high time you told her.”

  
So he did. He told her everything, talking until the wee hours of the morning. He didn’t water anything down or skip any details until he reached the moment he had found her again. Peggy didn’t say a word, not even when he cried as he described her funeral. When he finally reached the end of his tale, and turned to her with puffy eyes, she offered a handkerchief and a hug.  
“Oh my Captain” she said “I’m so sorry. Perhaps now that we know what happened, we can both move on.”

  
“Yes, together…”

  
“No, Steve.”

  
“What do you mean ‘no’?”

  
“You weren’t really going to stay, were you?”

  
“Well, yeah, I was until you asked that question. What do you expect? Me to just stop by, say hi to the love of my life, and leave?”

  
“Oh Steve, don’t be daft. There’s never a ‘one and only’.”

  
Steve was clutching at straws now. “But in the fairy tales…”

  
“Yes, Steve, and like most things in fairy tales, that idea is complete rubbish.”

  
“So, true love is fantasy.”

  
“No, you idiot! True love is alive and well. I was just saying that there isn’t just one person in the whole world you could be happy with forever. You’re a religious man, do you think God would be that cruel?”

  
He didn’t.

  
“Captain, you have a duty to your friends…”

  
“But my friends are here!”

  
“No, your friends aren’t here. If what you’ve said is true, your friends are in the universe you left behind. My Captain is still stuck at the bottom of the ocean. Were you honestly hoping to retire and let the horrible things you know are coming happen? To let some poor chap wake up seventy years later and go through the same crap you did, except it will be worse because no one believes him. ‘Everyone knows Captain America married Peggy Carter decades ago, you’re such a liar’. Are you?”

  
Captain America hadn’t thought of that.

  
Peggy placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Go home, Rogers. I’m not the woman you knew and you aren’t the man I love. I’m telling you to move on, to learn to love again. I’ll take what you’ve told me and make sure those terrible things never happen. I’ll make sure this universe learns from yours. Thank you, I know this isn’t what you wanted. But it’s the right thing and your mother would be proud.”

  
She kissed his forehead and walked away.

  
Back in the future, Steve Rogers returned to the present.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! As you might have noticed in the tags, this is the first in a series that will eventually become a crossover. No crossovers in this story yet, but next one will involve DC.  
> Please comment and critique! I have a strict no profanity policy, so please refrain from doing in so in your comments.


	2. Parting Gifts

“What happened to you?”

That was what Bucky said when Captain America returned puffy eyed.

“Bucky!” Sam scolded “You don’t just flat out ask why a man has been crying.”

“I didn’t ask why he was crying, you did.”

“You ok, Rogers?” Banner asked.

Steve took a shuddering breath. “Yeah” he squeaked.

“Na uh” Sam said “you are not ok. Either you need some serious professional help or several hours of shut eye.”

“No” Steve said “I just need some time. Like Tony said, I need to get a life, and I can’t do that if everyone is looking for Captain America. I just need to be alone right now, to figure out some stuff. Can you just tell everyone…tell them I went back in time and lived a happy life with Peggy or something? I promise I’ll come back.”

“Whaaat?” Sam said. “You can’t expect me to tell everyone that load of baloney. Who’d believe me?”

“Sure.” Bucky said, then to Sam, “Don’t tell me you’ve never lied to your superior officer before?”

Hulk waved for them to be quiet. “Of course, we will. Sometimes you just need a break from the whole hero thing, figure out your own life so you can save someone else’s.”

Steve made a shaky exit, leaving behind a bickering Falcon and White Wolf. Hulk followed.

“I knew you’d come back. I wanted to give you the chance to say goodbye. But before you go, I have some things for you.”

Steve followed Banner to a locker. Inside were several items. There was a dagger embossed with silver and gold with a wicked curved blade that looked like it had been part of a matching set. There was a Ziploc bag full of numbered USB drives and a worn journal.

“Natasha left these for you.”

Steve picked up each item almost reverently and placed them in the backpack Hulk had offered him. The backpack also had several other “hitch-hiking essentials”, one of many Banner had ready to go from his days on the run.

Steve threw on a Marvel style disguise (a hoodie and a baseball cap) and got on a bus to anywhere.

He was feeling kind of numb, with no plans for the future. All he knew was he needed some time away from being Captain America. It was with no small amount of trepidation, that he opened the journal.

The first thing he noticed was the handwriting. Light, with small, pointy, right slanted letters and wide spacing, it seemed to flow across the page methodically. In the margins were beautiful illuminations drawn in the Japanese style. A quick flip through revealed common subjects of the drawings: two young redhaired girls, always together; a woman who sometimes had wings, maybe a magical being, who’s outfit resembled a fox complete with ears and tale, her long wavy red hair fluttering in the breeze; foxes and maned wolves; humans with a variety of wings doing various things; men in strange black and white armor; and various members of the Avengers, Steve among them.

He turned back to the beginning. Inside was a note.

_Hello Steve,_

_If you’re reading this note, then I didn’t make it. I knew there was a good chance of that. Bringing back half the universe would be risky, but I hope I was the only one to fall. I have the least to lose, after all. No family left behind, no broken hearts because of me. I just hope we won._

Steve wanted so badly to tell her she was wrong; she had left a family behind. The Avengers were her family, the Bartons were family, and they had all been broken up by her loss. They had wanted to have a funeral, but there was nothing to bury. It was Pepper who had suggested a celebration of life instead, but no one could find it inside themselves to celebrate after Tony’s funeral. So Pepper had suggested they wait a little bit, but she had sworn it would happen, even if she and Morgan were the only people in attendance.

Steve went back to reading.

_I’m not sorry that I died. After shattering so many families in my life, I’m glad to go trying to heal the universal family._

_I always wanted that, a family. To be a mother and have a husband who was always a father first. But it never worked out._

_Steve, I wrote this journal with you in mind from the beginning. In case I never finished my work, I wanted someone to understand. Now that I’m dead, there’s no point in keeping secrets anymore. I know you will understand, that you’ll finish it. Others would try and fail, but I have to believe you will succeed._

_Read the journal from front to back. You’ll find instructions for the USB drives when the time comes. This next part is optional, but I always wanted to take one of those long trips where you stop to help everyone along the way. Of course, my work prevented it. Would you do that for me? I can just see you riding your motorcycle, stopping at gas stations to read the next passage in my journal. If you decide to, there’s a false front on the journal hiding everything you would need._

Yes, Steve would do that for her. It would be nice to do something as simply Steve again.

_Don’t do anything rash before you finish reading, alright? You have to hear everything I have to say, or you will fail. Failure is not an option._

_Please, Steve, be safe. I can only go because I know you will stay._

_Sincerely,_

_‘Tasha_

Steve carefully folded up the note and put it in his shirt pocket. He opened the false top and found plenty of cash and false documents, enough to buy a personal jet in every major currency and get him into any country with no trouble.

The idea of traveling not for the sake of reaching a destination, but more for the journey, appealed to him. He also recognized something: he wanted to help people. Not because it was the right thing to do, but because he genuinely enjoyed it. It was a part of him that had nothing to do with Captain America; Captain America was just a means of doing it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so you know, chapter sizes will vary. Most are longer than this.


	3. Stupid Secrets

Steve was waiting at yet another bus stop, munching a churro he had gotten from an old lady after he gave her directions. He went a step further and walked her to a destination, her sons churro shop. Steve now had five pounds of churros in his backpack.

Steve pulled out the journal and read the first entry.

_I hate keeping secrets._

An interesting first sentence in a spy’s journal.

_Sometimes they’re stupid secrets. That if I were to spill them would make all our lives easier, but not enough to balance out the trouble I’d get into for telling. Those are the secrets Fury is most often forced to keep from you. Stupid politicians who keep Fury from doing his job and make him an enemy of his friends._

_You know, Steve, Fury really hated deceiving you. But he had to find ways to motivate you and push you in the right direction without revealing classified information. Even he doesn’t know half the things he needs to do his job right. Someday I hope our government leaders will realize the proper balance between trust and failsafe, giving enough free rein for agents to trust who they deem fit and work with their allies._

_But I’ve heard that takes a thousand years at least to master unless you have someone to show you how. But once you get it right, you can bounce back from untold levels of corruption and chaos._

_But I digress._

_Some secrets are annoying. Mostly because the people you have to keep them from are the scum of the earth, but not apparently so. They’re “respectable” folks, so I can’t punch them in their smug faces. They subtly pry and I keep my mouth shut because they aren’t worthy of knowing. They don’t deserve my respect even. These secrets make me crabby, because I’d rather not be working with these people in the first place. I’ll spare you the list of generals, politicians, and so on that fit under this category._

Steve had quite a long list of those people too. He was glad he never had to deal with them for to long, because he knew he wouldn’t have had the self-control to keep from strangling them. Tony wasn’t even that annoying.

Tony…

Steve didn’t have many regrets in his life, but that was one of them. Sure, he found the man infuriating. He never took anything seriously, was prideful…but they were also friends. They got on each other’s nerves, fought all the time, were constantly refusing to acknowledge the other, but they were friends. It was complicated and Steve wished he had made more of an effort to understand Tony. Maybe they could have been closer than a begrudging respect. Maybe if they’d had a mediator, someone who was a close friend to both of them and understood both of their styles. But neither of them had that many close friends anyway.

Besties was never an option, but they could have been a great deal closer. They had respect and, now that he looked back, Steve realized they clashed because they both believed the other could be doing better and were frustrated by that. They had been equals, neither intimidated by the other. They called each other out on their weaknesses, “brought balance to the Force” as Spider-Man might say (whatever that meant).

Now Steve desperately wished he hadn’t broken that tentative friendship in Civil War, that they’d made up sooner. Because listening to Pepper talk, he learned things about her husband.

Tony did take his actions seriously, they kept him up at night. His signature snark was a defense and his way of distracting others from their own fear. His pride hid a man who always wondered if he had done enough.

Steve could relate to that. He wished he’d seen it sooner. But it was too late.

Steve turned back to the words on the page.

_The worst kind are the secrets that hurt to keep._

_Why they hurt can vary and why I keep them does too._

_Steve, I knew Bucky killed Tony’s parents. I also knew details that could have made it so much easier for Tony to forgive him. But I couldn’t share them. I trusted Tony, but I knew him to well. Those details would lead him to do things, to try fix something he didn’t understand and would be to stubborn to leave alone. If I told him, the best I could hope for was his death alone. So, I kept silent and watched._

_In general, these secrets I could speak, and you would never tell. You would not judge me for them, it would be so healing for me to spill, things I desperately want to talk to you about. But if I do, I know you will go and make things worse. You will try to help, and not fully understanding, fail spectacularly again and again as long as you live._

_These are burdens I must bear._

_But now I am gone and someone else will have to bear them._

_Steve, this journal is full of the last kind of secret. I worry you will take this knowledge and try, and fail, to make things right. I’m not there to make sure you don’t do irreparable harm, all I can do is place my trust in you. I have to try. I owe them that much._

_Just listen and try to understand me. Hear our story. That’s all I ever wanted._

The bus pulled up and Steve got on. He moved to the back and got comfortable. Satisfied, he pulled down his baseball cap and tried to grab some shut eye.

_Break…_

The boom of mortar shells. The screams of dying men. Lines of barbed wire. Thanos laughing.

Steve whirled as he heard Vision screaming.

“I’m coming!”

Vision, deep, quiet, and empathetic, he’d only been alive for such a short time. He had so much more to give. He had Wanda. Steve had to save him.

But he was to late. The android was dead, Mind Stone gone. Steve watched as Wanda turned to dust.

Tony was lying on the ground, body burnt. Bucky was staining the snow with his blood. Howard Stark was lying on the ground, dead.

Natasha was staring at him, dead lips moving.

_“I hope I was the only one to fall.”_

“Sir, wake up, you’re safe.”

Someone was gently shaking him. Steve’s eyes flew open.

A dream, he realized, it was just a dream. He was on a bus, not a battlefield.

A woman was standing in front of him, smiling gently. She was tall, with red wavy hair and forget-me-not blue eyes. She wore a white blouse, black slacks, and red flats.

“Thanks.” Steve said.

“No problem, hon. My father served in the military too. Here,“ she handed him a small glass bottle with a dropper “this always helped him sleep at night. I recommend mixing it with hot chocolate or some other warm drink.”

Steve took it. Over the years he’d come to trust his intuition, and it was saying this lady was trustworthy and wouldn’t give him something harmful. Besides, she reminded him of someone he had once known, but he couldn’t place who.

“Thank you.”

“I’m glad to help a hero out. I hope you find what you’re looking for, Captain.”

Steve blinked and she was already stepping off the bus as it rolled away.

Steve took a closer look at the bottle. He recognized it; it was identical to one Natasha used to carry, down to the handwritten label and instructions. She was always slipping a few drops in Bucky’s drink and Steve had noticed it always helped his friend get to sleep faster and stay there longer.

Steve had stopped her the first time and she had explained it was a natural remedy. He remembered her showing him how to make it just to soothe his overprotective Bucky protocols. He’d forgotten the recipe, but it was harmless, even if he hadn’t recognized half the plants.

He decided to read more from the journal.

_First off, even though I was never allowed to reveal it, I have the same level of clearance as Fury. He just trusts me to keep my mouth shut about it. He needed someone to vent to about all the stupid secrets and he knew I could take it. So there._

_Second, forget everything you know about my childhood. Most of it was a cover story._

_I have no birth certificate and no parents. I’m not even Russian. My first name was chosen by the closest people I had to family and my last name was created to fill the blank on paperwork. My employer called me Natalia in an attempt to sever ties between me and those who loved me. I humored them._

_I don’t know what circumstances surrounded my birth, but I know I came into Hydra at most hours after my birth along with my best friend Leah. I was Hydra property and they trained me until I was thirteen, when I was traded to the KGB._

_Hydra sterilized me, but it wasn’t to make me more efficient. It was to avoid “complications”. I hated them for that. I wanted to be a mommy, like the Senator was. She said it was the most beautiful thing in the world and she was right._

_But I’m getting ahead of myself._

_I was raised to be a mercenary by the most lethal fighters in the universe. They were forced to do that. But every day they prayed that I would receive the chance to be free, to choose the right. So, in preparation for that day, they planted in me the seeds of goodness._

_It was a deadly game for all of us, but they took the risk. It is upon what they taught me that I was able to become the woman I was. I learned their stories, heard whispers of doubt about what I was doing. I loved them._

_They were the Prisoners. Like Bucky, they were stolen from death. Like him, Hydra sought to turn them into mindless killing machines. But they couldn’t._

_Hydra was constantly trying to find ways to make the Prisoners mindless slaves, so some were always awake for experimentation. They were on rotation, but make no mistake, they had a hibernation chamber for every prisoner and more._

_I would watch them being tortured and not recognize anything was wrong. The Prisoners didn’t want us to recognize it was wrong, because if we did we would be killed._

_Leah and I were as close as sisters, trained to be partners in crime. She had beautiful emerald eyes and her hair was more orange than mine. We lived happily enough, playing like little girls. If you met us, you wouldn’t suspect a thing._

_The Prisoners made sure we had a childhood. They taught us the dances of their homelands, and it was like a little piece of heaven when we would dance for them. We would be happy and even the guards would stop to watch. The Prisoners, they protected us from the guards._

_But they couldn’t be there all the time._

_But when they weren’t, Bucky was._

_I didn’t know him as Bucky back then. I knew him as the Winter Soldier. But Leah and I knew he was a man with two sides. We called them Winter and Soldier._

_Winter was wonderful. I assume he was the Bucky you knew. He was funny and kind, always asking the guards how their kids were doing, always surprised by how much time went by. Hydra was careful not to show him the darker side, because Winter was a defender of the innocent._

_Leah and I, we loved Winter. He would play princess with us, let us braid his hair with flowers. He was our wonderful big brother._

_Winter was beautiful and pure, but Soldier spoiled it. Soldier only came out when Hydra had a mission for him. He was cold and ugly, he frightened me. But there were certain things even he wouldn’t do. Hurting children and killing defenseless women were out of the question._

_As Leah and I grew older, the guards started to take an interest in us. We didn’t know what they wanted, just that they were acting creepy and whatever it was we wouldn’t like it._

_One day, a group of them gave chase. We ran, but they cornered us. I remember clinging to Leah as we tried to shelter each other, hunkered on the floor in a corner, their leering faces bearing down._

_I heard the roar first; it was the sound of righteous rage. Then Soldier barreled into the guards, throwing them away from us. He placed himself between us, a rabid animal that ripped apart any guard that threatened us. It was frighteningly beautiful._

_No one ever bothered us again._

_Years later I realized how much the Prisoners had sacrificed to protect us from such things. I swore I would never throw away that gift._

_I know Bucky doesn’t remember those parts; Hydra would never let him keep those moments of goodness if he ever got free. But I know you could help him remember._

_Before I stop for tonight, I want to tell you something. I remember the night Tony’s parents died. I was seven and Winter was awake. He kissed my forehead and tousled Leah’s hair, promising he’d always come back to us. We watched as Winter left and Solider came out._

_He did come back, but he was Winter without being released. He was screaming, remembering I would later realize, begging forgiveness from Howard and Maria and asking God to let him die. The guards pinned him to a table, filling him full of drugs. But he kept remembering._

_Leah and I remembered the Prisoners teaching us about God and saying He listened to the prayers of little children._

_We were crying as we watched Bucky writhe, but we were truly terrified when he stopped breathing. They couldn’t bring him back. We knew what death was, we’d killed. We didn’t want Winter to die, so we fell on our little knees and prayed._

_I asked God to bring my friend back to me and Bucky began to breathe._

_They never made Soldier break his rules again._

_When I grew older, I wondered if I should have asked for that. But after all our adventures together, I’m glad God brought our friend back._

Steve was touched. It was nice knowing not even Hydra could bury all of his friend, to see that there were others who had cared for him, to know he was a hero to two little girls.

Steve always thought Natasha was an atheist, but it looked like he might be wrong. He wondered if she had anything else to say on the matter.

He also was curious about this Leah. Natasha had made it clear the two were close. So why hadn’t Steve ever heard of her? And what of the Prisoners? Where were they now?


	4. Hawks and Foxes

It was Sunday and Steve was sitting in a place of worship. Steve was a Christian and he always tried to make Sunday a special day when circumstances allowed. That normally looked like him finding a place of worship, saying a prayer, and reading the bible. Today he was sitting in a Catholic Chapel on the grounds of a children’s hospital.

He was alone, eyes closed in prayer. He was thanking God for saving his best friend yet again and for the wonderful Prisoners who had helped raise Natasha. Asking that He watch over the Stark family and the other Avengers. Mostly, just wanting some help with whatever Widow had left for him to do.

There was a tug at his sleeve and he looked up. There was a girl, about seven years old, with an IV hooked up to her. Her skin was pale and sallow, her eyes sunken but still full of light. She was wearing on oxygen mask.

“Hi Captain America.”

Steve chuckled. Why was it kids always saw straight through a hero’s disguise?

“Hi kiddo.”

“You talking to Jesus?”

“Yep.”

“Me too. I’m asking him to give Mr. Iron Man and Black Widow a hug from me.”

“That’s sweet.”

“I was going to ask him to give you a hug too, but I guess I can do that myself now.”

She wrapped her arms and around Steve and gave him a weak hug and he hugged her gently back. “Thank you for my guardian angel.” She whispered in his hear.

“What?”

“Thank you for my guardian angel, Vision. I’m Blipped; when I was sick before they didn’t have the medicine to make me better. But when I came back, they did. If the blip didn’t happen, I’d be dead. And Mr. Vision died so I could live. He’s my guardian angel.”

“I don’t know if that’s how it works…”

“I asked Jesus if Vision had a soul. He said yes. All Avengers go to heaven.”

Steve smiled. “Thank you, Cutie.”

It was amazing how kids could be so blunt about sensitive topics and unoffensive at the same time. He appreciated her faith. It was nice to see a silver lining to the events of Infinity War. He knew Vision would have been glad to here his loss had allowed this girl to live just as assuredly as Steve believed what she had said about the android having a soul and going to heaven.

He and the little girl visited for a little bit before she had to go.

Steve had always found comfort in his God. Some said that if God existed, why did he let bad things happen. Steve argued if he didn’t let bad people make bad choices, he would be not better than Ultron. God provided the means to defeat the darkness. Because what are the odds of Scott getting stuck in the quantum realm just as the Blip happened?

Steve pulled out Black Widow’s journal.

_I bet you think I’m an atheist. That I’m secretly judging you when you act all Christian. I’m sorry about that._

_S.H.I.E.L.D has a very strict non-religious policy. You don’t talk religion with non-agents, don’t even hint at it, unless they bring it up first and ask you about your opinion. Even among agents, the topic doesn’t come up much. That’s the only reason I didn’t say amen when you said, “There is only one God and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t dress like that.” (I only called Thor a god because protocol dictated I refer to him by what he thought himself to be.)_

_After praying for Winter, I didn’t think about religion much. It was pure desperation that drove me to my knees. I went about life, just doing what I was told._

_Then S.H.I.E.L.D sent Clint to kill me._

_I was twenty years old; it had been seven years since I had seen my best friend Leah. I’m walking under a tree and this guy pops out right in front of me. He’s hanging upside down, in a tree, with a bow strapped to his back, and just grinning at me. It was so unexpected that I actually hesitated to shoot him._

_Then he sticks his hand out and says “Hi, I’m Clint Barton, a friend of Leah’s. You must be Natasha Romanoff. Your bestie is looking for you. You trained together under Hydra. I’m supposed to take you out, not on a date mind you, I’m already married, but I would really hate to kill you if you are Natasha Romanoff. Besides my orders were to kill Natalia Romanoff, but if that isn’t your real name, I could pretend otherwise. Come on, I know where Leah is. Want to go say hi?”_

_I mean, Clint was thirty and I swear this was more like something Spider-Man would do, but it worked._

_I had spent seven years missing my best friend and here was a possible chance of finding her. If it turned out he was lying, I could take him out._

_I thought Clint was the weirdest person I had ever met. I knew he could have taken me out from a distance with that bow of his, but instead he got right in my face and flirted with death._

_I was intrigued._

_He took me to The F.O.X Café and ordered a lemonade. When I looked up to ask the waitress for a salad, I froze. She was staring at me with those emerald eyes, shocked. It had been seven years, but she still recognized me._

_“Natasha?”_

_“Leah?”_

_I glanced at Clint, who was stubbornly refusing to acknowledge the scene before him._

_Leah dropped her notepad and grabbed my arm, dragging me behind her. “Are you being monitored?” she whispered._

_“Not by my employer. The KGB stopped doing that years ago after I took out the guy they sent to watch me. But that guy, the one at my table, he was sent to take me out, so his employer might be watching him.”_

_“Nah, Clint is fine. S.H.I.E.L.D trusts him to do the right thing. I’m glad it was him and that you didn’t kill him. He’s a friend of mine.”_

_“S.H.I.E.L.D? Isn’t that Hydra’s enemy?”_

_“I left Hydra shortly after you were traded to the KGB.”_

_“Why?”_

_“I’ll tell you in a minute.”_

_Leah pulled me through a door labeled employees only, and what I saw behind it blew my mind._

_The things Leah introduced me to that day made what Dr. Strange does seem normal. I was about to have my first introduction to magic._

_While the structure behind the door defied logic and was utterly breathtaking, it isn’t important information. Who was behind that door is much more important._

_The fact the mythology behind Thor and Loki’s people was astoundingly accurate was perfectly plausible after I met some of their Greek counterparts. Granted, the ones I met no longer bought that “I am a god” crap. But it sure gave me an edge when interrogating Loki._

_When I stepped through that door, I was greeted by the sight of satyr waiters and dryad baristas. Wolves sat at tables with talking rabbits. Griffins perched on balconies chatting with centaurs. If I had read the Chronicles of Narnia, I would have thought I stepped through a 21 st century wardrobe._

_Leah dragged me to a table where three people were chatting. The first was a tall woman in her prime with forget-me-not blue eyes, wavy red hair, a white blouse, black slacks, and red flats. She gave me a smile while her eyes pierced my soul. I instantly knew she would make a master interrogator._

_The second person was a graceful woman who was the balance between age and youth. Her hair was black with threads of silver and her eyes were a dark blue. She radiated regal authority and matriarchal strength._

_The third was a young man my age with golden windswept curls, sparkling blue eyes, angelic features and a mischievous grin that could have belonged to the devil._

_All three of them were relaxed, but I could tell they were deadly. I was silently being judged, and if they deemed me a threat, there would be no escape._

_I scrutinized them right back and pieced together that they were related. The man, he was looking at Leah with familiarity, and I deduced they must have either been partners or in a relationship, or both._

_“Fierra, Rhea, Robin, this is my best friend Natasha. She will be requiring protection.” Leah said._

_I whirled on her. “Why do I need protection? It’s just that Clint fellow who’s trying to kill me, and I thought you said he was a friend.”_

_Leah gave me a sympathetic look that instantly put me on edge. “’Tasha we need to talk.”_

_I had always believed that the people I was sent to kill were sick and twisted, merely pretending to be decent, that I was doing the world a service. That belief was shattered as Leah explained the evil that was Hydra and then the KGB. It made me sick._

_I managed to swallow down my bile until Leah finished explaining everything to me. She told me that she had her eyes opened shortly after I left as her life got steadily worse. Robin had slipped in undercover and helped her see the error of her ways. Together, they had brought down the base from the inside, but they failed to free the Prisoners before they had all been moved to an unknown location. Ever since, Leah and Robin had been inseparable._

_I smiled politely and excused myself for a moment, frantically searching for a restroom. I jumped when I felt a gentle hand on my back._

_“At ease,” said a gentle voice “the restrooms are this way.” The hand guided me down the hallway and held back my hair as I tossed my biscuits. When I finished, I looked up to see the redhaired woman, Fierra._

_She was smiling at me sadly. “Leah did the same thing when the truth finally hit her after the base fell. You’ll stay here until we can place you with S.H.I.E.L.D and make sure the KGB knows better than to bother you. It’s not your fault, sweetheart. You are as much a victim as the Prisoners. But as an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D you can fight back.”_

_“Are you…?”_

_“An agent? No, I can do more staying allegiance free. But Clint is, he’s a good man. He requested to be your partner. Now, let’s get back to the others.”_

_I felt something soft wrap around my shoulders. I looked and saw a large red wing wrapped around me. I gaped at Fierra._

_She grinned at me. “Leah hasn’t finished explaining everything, darling.”_

_Steve, you already know aliens exist. But there are plenty of strange, fantastical, beings that are native to earth. Our planet has been under threat for far longer than you supposed and most of the threats to it are unknow to S.H.I.E.L.D. Magic is alive and well, and there are other forces who have been protecting us from both threats foreign and local. They are happy to keep helping us along, many of them are just as human as you and me, and look forward to the day they can work beside superheroes like the Avengers._

_We are not alone._

_There is so much more I could say, but this should suffice: Fierra is one of those allies._

_After my brain was completely overwhelmed, Clint visited me._

_I was wary at first, until I saw who was with him. Lila Barton was one cute baby and I have and always will be a sucker for kids._

_“You want to hold her?”_

_Steve, Clint knew who I was and what I did. Yet he still asked if I wanted to hold his entire world. I knew he was going to be another best friend from then on._

_He gently showed me how to hold her and we talked about this, that, and the other for hours. Gradually, I eased up around him. By the end of the night he had convinced me to join S.H.I.E.L.D and working together was a good idea. He even started giving me pointers in the key differences in how Fury worked versus the KGB. Mainly, that Fury would trust me to make the right call and would tolerate it if I disobeyed a kill order._

_“Why didn’t you kill me? I could have killed you before you said a word. How did you know to take the risk?”_

_“Well, I was watching you, and most bad guys don’t take the time to help a kid find his parents.”_

_“I still could have killed you.”_

_“Well, I don’t know everything. Sometimes when I have to make a tough call, when I’m sent to kill, I check in with my ultimate superior.”_

_“Fury?”_

_“Nah, the man upstairs.”_

_“I don’t follow.”_

_“I pray about it. God knows everything, most importantly, he knows the person I’m sent to kill better than I do. He knows whether killing them is the right thing or going the extra mile to bring them in alive, or, on occasion, when to let them go. So, I ask Him what to do. He said I should talk to you.”_

_“Oh.”_

_Over the next few months as I became accustomed to S.H.I.E.L.D, Clint and I talked about religion. I would later learn that in that fateful prayer, Clint had had the impression he could trust me with his family. I was glad for that, because there were many times Hawkeye was clueless as to how to explain something and Laura could sum up two hours of his attempts in five minutes._

_Around their kitchen table, I learned a lot about life. I loved watching how their marriage worked as much as I enjoyed watching Leah and Robin’s growing romance. This was the kind of life the Prisoners always wanted for me._

_I was five years old when I completed my first mission. The target was an older man and his wife. As it would often be, Leah and I’s cover was part of an exotic dance troupe. We shared a ceremonial knife set, of which you have my half. We slit our targets’ throats with them._

_The couple had invited us into their home, gave us cookies. They gave us their spare room to sleep in. I didn’t see anything wrong with killing them that night._

_When Hydra was short on funds, they stood me before the evil men of the world and auctioned me like cattle. I accepted their pokes and prods because I thought it was normal._

_Clint taught me that what happened to me was not right. He showed me I could be more than my past._


	5. Friendly Foe

Steve stood by his motorcycle and watched the minivan drive away. He had pulled over to help a mother change the tire on her car. It was late at night and the kids were all asleep, dad at home with a sick younger brother.

Steve decided to string up his hammock a little farther off the road. He curled up and looked at the stars. He remembered his friends, the Guardians of the Galaxy, and wondered if any of them had returned to their home worlds.

He poured himself a mug of hot chocolate and put in a dropper full of the tincture from the woman on the bus. He sipped it softly and felt the calming warmth seep into his bones. While he waited for sleep to overtake him, he picked up the journal and began to read again.

_I remember the first time I saw Bucky in action, doing what Hydra had conditioned him to do._

_His target was my charge. He was Soldier and I was an armed obstacle, no longer in violation of his two rules. I could expect no mercy or recognition._

_As I struggled to keep myself and my charge alive, I was in awe of his skill. I knew he was good, but I had always thought I could take him now that I was older. I was wrong, doomed to fail my mission for the first time in my career. But even as I bled on the ground, I couldn’t help but smile. My brother was alive and I was determined to free him._

_Which meant capturing him alive._

_I knew that I didn’t have that level of skill, so Leah suggested I work with Fierra. Fierra is a woman of many talents and friends, and with her I learned many skills that few in the universe know. By her side I learned many of the nuisances of fighting for the right while not sinking to evil’s level._

_It was she who encouraged me to continue working as an assassin, her argument being that there were to few who were willing to question orders and make the tough calls themselves. The job of an assassin is vital and tricky; they have the ability to stop great evil, but if they strike to often and without question, they can create a world ruled by fear._

_Her guide became my guide; send a silent prayer and have the Lord confirm your orders. He knows the end from the beginning, and He won’t lead you astray. If He says kill or let live, you can go to bed at night knowing you did the right thing._

_I tried to find Bucky for years, but I only found where he had been. Murder scenes, terrorist attacks, all the evidence of his work but never him. Leah, Robin, and I would rush into a Hydra base only to find Bucky and the Prisoners had all been spirited away moments before._

_Over the years, for both Leah and I, freeing Winter and the others was placed on the back burner. When the opportunity arose, we took it, but no longer was it the sole focus of our lives. My job is S.H.I.E.L.D, but my work is freeing my family. I’m passing that work on to you, but the order to finish reading this history still stands._

_I can’t have you rushing in. If Hydra kills you, you are one of the lucky ones. If they capture you, well Bucky is a mild taste of what the future holds. If you manage to live but do not succeed, one of my brothers will die. They will leave the body for you to find._

_Steve, by the time you finish reading, I hope you will be ready to bear this burden. The USB drives hold all my notes on the subject. I don’t want it to keep you awake at night when you fail, because I don’t expect you to succeed the first time. It’s a painful waiting game, knowing that each failed attempt is a lost life. That’s why I had to stop obsessing over it, focus on my career. Please, Steve, forgive me for asking this from you._

Steve eyes slid shut and refused to open again. As the pull of sleep eased him into oblivion, Steve wished Natasha had told him about this sooner. He wondered if she had told anyone else, how long she had been carrying this burden alone.


	6. Memorials

Steve had been on the road for a couple weeks now. It had been fun helping people out. Changing tires, sharing meals with the homeless, getting kittens out of trees, the list went on and on.

It had also been painful. The cities were full of memorials to Iron Man. Shrines and graffitied walls dedicated to his friend were everywhere. The world was shocked by the loss of Tony Stark and wanted to honor his sacrifice. Captain was glad; Tony deserved it.

But he did wish someone would remember Black Widow.

He knew if Tony was alive, he would have been appalled that his fellow hero was going unsung. He’d have done something to honor her. Even if it said more Tony Stark than Natasha Romanoff.

That was why Cap was so surprised when he stumbled upon the garden.

He had found an F.O.X Café and, though he doubted it was the same one or had a secret magical back room, he thought it would be nice to honor Widow by ordering a salad and a lemonade. From where he sat by the window, he watched as small groups of people, all kinds of people, walked down one particularly dark alley. After paying, he decided to follow the next group that came by.

As he walked down the alley at the back of the group, he noticed that it seemed to grow longer. After a while, he felt grass beneath his feet as fireflies lit the air. They came out in a small open grassy area, where a small crowd was standing in front of an arch. There was a podium and they all seemed to be waiting for something to begin. Steve glanced around and marveled at the diversity. Young, old, male, female, black, white, even a few people who didn’t quite look human. Cap could have sworn he saw a few S.H.I.E.L.D jackets in the crowd. While their attire was varied, they all looked to be in mourning.

After a few minutes, a woman with black hair streaked with silver strands stepped up to the podium.

“Friends, I thank you all for coming here tonight as we add another memorial to our garden. We are gathered here tonight to honor the sacrifice of our dear friend the Black Widow. Many of you knew her by name, all of you were personally touched by her actions. Tonight, anyone is welcome to share memories of her and insights on who she was as a person.

“I will never forget her friendship with my son and his beloved. She and Leah were sisters in all but blood, and Widow learned to tolerate my son’s antics. She was one of the few people whose glare could quell Robin’s mischievous streak.

“Her kindness, while not known to most of the world, was legendary to me. Her mothering instincts were undeniable, and there is many a young man to whom she has become a second mother. I’m sure if she were still with us, Spider-Man would have found himself under her protection. She always looked out for the children, finding ways to help them out of the darkness.

“There is much more I could say, but I’ll end with this. I loved her. I wish all of you could have known her as I have. For you, she was a guardian angel. For a few of us, she was family.”

Several others got up to speak, baring testimony to how she had shaped their lives for the better. She had saved their lives, but more often than not, she had spared them. Men who had committed terrible crimes, run vast criminal empires, or had once been horribly corrupt spoke of how she had chosen to go against her initial orders and given them a second chance. She had shaped them into forces for good, even when they would have laughed at the idea before. Hardened criminals were moved to tears as they thanked God for sending her their way.

Several S.H.I.E.L.D agents shared how they had known Black Widow. A young black-haired man named Jackson Darby spoke of how she had been his mentor and taught him everything he knew, how she had been an older sister and an aunt to him. How he could speak to her about anything, things no one else would understand, and how she had respected his mother, a humble nurse who was now the terror of all agents skimping on their medical leave. He had begun crying and his mother had moved to comfort him as he left the stand.

Hawkeye had shared a few thoughts but been to overcome to say much. Instead he read messages from “dear friends who were unable to attend, but with us remotely”, who Steve recognized as Laura Barton and her kids.

Fury’s speech was simple: “I could tell you a lot of things about Black Widow, but it’s all classified. But that wasn’t who she was. Black Widow was one of those people who lifted the four corners of the earth in her own way. To most, she seemed cold and heartless. But in reality, she was one of the kindest, most loving, empathetic, feeling souls in the universe. She was never a killer; she was a protector. I didn’t lose an agent; I lost a friend.”

The last speaker was the woman with red hair from the bus. She stood in regal silence for a minute before speaking. “Widow never felt the need to mince words. When she spoke, you would do well to listen. And when she felt the need to use many words, you knew it was important to her personally.

“Now she is no longer with us. I would urge us all to heed her advice and cherish our memories of her. Remember her as she would like to be known: a protector who took no pleasure in killing and mourned the loss of any life.”

With that, the crowd slowly dispersed through the arch. Steve followed them slowly. By the time he had passed through, almost everyone was out of sight. He found himself in front of a beautiful statue garden, each hewn in exquisite detail and beautifully colored.

Captain wandered among the statues, in a variety of mundane to heroic poses, reading the names of those depicted and their stories. He was surprised to recognize a few old friends depicted as statues, down to shocks of red hair or twinkling brown eyes.

The garden was seemingly abandoned by the time he came to Natasha’s statue. She was depicted standing resolutely, arm outstretched, the Soul Stone clasped in her hand. Her eyes sparkled with resolve and hope, and small smile on her lips as she looked down at the viewer with compassion.

After admiring the statue for a moment, the statues to her right and left caught his eye. To her left was young man with angelic features and golden curls like sunshine. Blue eyes shone with defiance as he stared up at a huge frilled serpent, a sword in his hand. A deep slash down the serpent’s length glistened as the serpent was frozen forever in its death throes. The young man was not unscathed, a broken fang jutting out from his shoulder, but he looked like he would live. Steve was puzzled by why his statue was there, even as he glanced down and read the name Robin.

The statue to the right was of Leah. Steve recognized it as such even before he read the name on the pedestal. She was depicted as a bride in armor.

“What happened?” Steve asked as he tried to read details on their stories but found none.

“Many things, Captain.”

Steve turned to see the red-haired woman. She was smiling sadly.

“How did they die? Please, they were friends of someone I cared about. They were like family to her.”

“I am well aware, Steve Rogers. Natasha talked about you often. She often wished they could have met you.”

“You’re Fierra, aren’t you. I haven’t finished reading her journal yet…”

“Natasha could never bring herself to write about it. She asked me to tell you.”

In her hand appeared a swirling blue orb and Steve found himself living another’s memories.

The serpent was easily three stories long, vivid blues and green with an iridescent frill that blocked the rays of the sun. Fangs the size of sabers dripped with a clear liquid. Violent violet eyes stared down at the angelic warrior below it. Robins golden curls dripped with perspiration and his blue eyes with gleamed with murderous intent, broadsword raised.

The snake lunged and the crowd cheered. A woman’s voice cried out in warning. Robin leapt to the side and in that second saw his opening. He changed directions and ripped his blade down the serpent’s belly, faster that the serpent’s flickering tongue. The victory was short lived, as the young warrior knew it would be, the lifeless head falling and impaling a deadly fang into his shoulder.

The venom coursed through his veins, the magical curse presenting its wicked offered: Live a life dedicated to evil or willingly die.

There was only one answer and all hopes of proposing to the love of his life the next day were dashed. He fell into Leah’s arms, her emerald eyes glistening with tears.

“I know you said you would never kiss me even if I was at Death’s door, but I rang the doorbell so how ‘bout a small one?” he said as he presented her a beautiful ring.

She kissed him as his life slipped away. As his body went cold in her arms, Leah screamed into the night as all sounds of battle fell silent.

The memory ended and Steve was aware of Fierra once more.

“And Leah…?” he asked.

“I don’t think Natasha ever got over seeing her sister like that.

“Leah threw herself into her work and defeating evil. She maintained her high moral code, Robin’s memory kept her from descending into vengeance. Natasha was there for her during the long years that followed. Leah fell in the line of duty shortly before Natasha was assigned to observe Tony.”

“She never talked about them.”

“Natasha’s a very private person; she doesn’t share things about her personal life unless she thinks it will help the other person.”

“How much did you know about her?”

Fierra smiled. “I’m an exception, darling. She kept no secrets from me. Fury would kill to know a fraction of what I do. You are now another one of those exceptions; don’t mess it up.”


	7. Last Confessions, Parting Thoughts

It had been a month since Captain had started this journey. He’d helped plenty of people and felt ready to return to the Avengers. But he didn’t want it to be over.

He held Natasha’s journal in his hands, staring at the final passage. He wanted to never read it, because once he did, she would truly be gone. He would no longer hear her voice as he read along, and he would be left to feel guilty he’d never gotten to know her like this when she was alive. He would start missing her more than he had before he started reading the journal.

He would be responsible for freeing the closest thing she had to family. He had a good idea where they might be, and he knew once he had read the last passage, he wouldn’t be able to sleep until he had at least scouted it out. He’d been studying her notes and felt he could do that much safely.

But he had promised, even if no one had heard him.

Tenderly, he fingered the worn page and began to read.

_I have a feeling I won’t have the chance to write in this again. I’ve been keeping it since you came into my life. I’ve always admired you, Steve, and I just wanted to leave you with some parting thoughts. I only have one more secret to tell and a gift to give._

_I’m having a hard time writing this; I feel so stupid. I’m dead, so this couldn’t possibly make anything awkward. I might as well just say it._

_Steve, you are wonderful, everything a woman could ever want. And I’m not talking about your muscles. No, I would have admired you even if you were still a tiny shrimp of a man. You’re honest and kind, love kids, always placing God first, I don’t have the time to tell you all the reasons you are wonderful._

_You need someone to tell you that. You don’t give yourself enough credit, Captain. I know Peggy is gone, but neither of us want you to be lonely for the rest of your life. Go find someone who will love you as much as we would have._

_The last USB drive is special. The password is “Families are forever” and it contains a bit of a second journal._

_You know I’m a Christian now and I know you always liked learning about what others believe. I remember you trying to understand Norse religion and talking with Thor, still utterly confused by his answers. I had to hold back a snort._

_I’m a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of latter-day Saints and the USB drive holds a digital copy of my Book of Mormon along with my personal notes and testimony. The book contains what I believe, and even if you don’t believe any of it, the messages it contains will bring peace into your life. Heaven knows you need that, what, with Tony constantly on your tail and keeping Bucky from getting into too much trouble._

_I don’t think Pepper will let Tony “retire” again, do you? The world needs him too much. We need both of you, so please, patch things up with the man. Stop being a butt and be his friend._

_Well, that’s it. Thank you for everything. It’s been a pleasure working with you. I promised you one last secret and here it is._

_If I ever loved a man, it would have been you._

_I love you, Captain._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that you have read this chapter you have a moral responsibility to listen to "A Little Fall of Rain" from Les Miserables. Simply replace "Marius" with "Rogers" and "Eponine" with "Natasha" and all will become clear. Keep tissues on hand.


	8. Epilogue

The Hydra base was strangely quiet. The Prisoners held their breath as they waited for something to happen. Leah was gone, Natasha was dead, was there anyone else who could free their little treasure?

Rumor had it that Captain America had been hot on Hydra’s tail these last few days, following the faint trail of breadcrumbs Hydra was leaving him. Yes, they would keep him thinking he didn’t have time to waste, lead him right to his goal. They would be waiting.

The Prisoners prayed he would stay away. Because if he fell, who would save him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, please let me know how you liked this story! The second one is in progress and will bring DC and Marvel together. I hope this has given you a taste of what you can expect from me in the future.


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